Kiku had nearly fainted when he was assigned his mission. They wanted him to track down a criminal? This was way more than he could handle. He wanted to ask if they were insane, but that would have been rude. Instead he just dealt with the pressure in his own way.

Once he stopped hyperventilating, it was explained that this was just a petty thief. Not violent, not dangerous, just a bit sleazy. He'd been refusing to show up to court, so they were sending a ninja to convince him. So all Kiku had to do was convince a grown man that he was intimidating and should be listened to. Yes, that was much more sensible.

An hour later, Kiku stood in front of an apartment door. It was one of Soragakure's worse neighborhoods, only a little better than the one he lived in. A lot of the windows were barred, and the whole area looked to be in pretty bad repair. Kiku took a few deep breaths, trying to calm his nerves. He couldn't really intimidate someone when he was quite visibly scared out of his mind. He had to look tough, for the sake of the village. Kiku practiced on the closed door. “Halt, criminal scum!” he said firmly. Yes, that was good. He was ready.

The Genin knocked as firmly as he could. It wasn't the strongest of knocks, but he hoped it got the point across. More than a minute later, he realized it hadn't. He made a fist and pounded on the door. “Soragakure ninja, open up!” A voice came from inside. ”Yeah, I'm coming!” A large, rough-looking man opened the door. He had the signature flattened nose of someone who'd been hit in the face plenty of times. Kiku gulped. They had made it sound like he was some sort of wiry wuss, like Kiku was. This guy looked like he might be a boxer. Or at the very least, someone who fought on a regular basis. This wasn't right. The mission was supposed to be for a weenie, not for a guy who could eat a bowl of nails for breakfast. Kiku put on his best serious face. “Sir, I'm going to need you to come with me. I have to take you into custody.” The man just laughed. ”You? Were they out of genin? Are academy brats doing missions now?” Kiku felt hurt. He knew he should have expected that reaction, but it still sucked to hear it. “Um, I am a genin sir. I'm fifteen. Now if you'd come with me-”

He was cut off by another raucous laugh. The man shoved him, and Kiku stumbled back a step. ”Nah, I don't think so. I got a better idea. You go tell your bosses you didn't find me, and I don't break your twiggy little legs.” Kiku took a step back, taking a taijutsu stance. He was absolute crap at taijutsu, and he knew it. Still, he had to put up a fight. He took a deep breath, forming up some chakra and channeling it into his fists. A thin layer of fire coated his hands, heating up the air around him but leaving him untouched. “I can't do that, sir.” He was terrified, but he still had a mission to do.

The man attacked first. It was a wide swing, giving Kiku time to avoid it. He ducked under the punch and hit the man in the gut. The larger man took a step back, grimacing in pain. Kiku didn't hit hard, but the fire added a little extra oomph to it. He pressed the attack, trying to jump up and hit the man in the jaw. The man brought his arms up to protect his face, getting a light burn on his forearm and giving Kiku what was sure to become a bruise on his knuckles. Kiku tried to shake the pain out of his hand, and got a knee in the gut while he was distracted. The fire around his hands dissipated, and he bent over gasping for breath while his target shoved him aside and ran out past him.

Kiku ignored the pain in his stomach, struggling to run after the man. The guy hit hard and Kiku wasn't the toughest, so he was a bit slow at first. The pace quickly picked up, and soon Kiku was gaining on him. The man was quick, but he wasn't ninja quick. The genin was catching up fast. Kiku finally had the chance for his big line. “Halt, criminal scum!” As soon as he had shouted it out he realized how silly it sounded. But the man was laughing again, which slowed him down a bit. Kiku jumped onto the wall alongside him, and the man ducked into an alley. Kiku breathed a sigh of relief. That was a dead end, he had caught him.

Kiku walked down the alley, and saw the man leaning against the wall at the end. ”So am I gonna have to beat your ass to get out of here?” “No, sir, you're coming with me.” The man chuckled, stepping away from the wall. Kiku's hands flashed through a few hand signs, and he cupped a hand to his mouth. “Katon: Housenka no Jutsu!” A dozen fireballs shot from his mouth rapid-fire, hitting the brick wall behind the target. The man turned around, and saw a neat silhouette of himself scorched into the wall. Now, it was his turn to gulp nervously. ”You know, I think I'll just tag along.”

[Words: 926, mission here]

Approved! Funny